A Completely Subjective Ranking Of Beach Cocktails, From Best To Worst

Most of the time, ordering a drink that comes with a big wedge of fruit and a little umbrella is absurd. But when the sun is out, the sand is nearby and the ocean is lining the horizon, getting down with a beach cocktail is the best decision you can make in your life.

There are a great many different beach cocktails that can be mixed (or preferably, blended) by your vacation bartender, but not all of them are equal. Some of them actually are a downright disgrace and a waste of calories. And some of them are so good, you’ll quickly order another round.

We’ve rounded them up below ― the good, the bad, and the absolutely ridiculous ― and ranked them from disgraceful to delightful. Read it and order wisely next time you’re at the beach.